


4LL MY FR13NDS 4R3 D34D!

by echinoderms



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Additional Warnings Apply, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-13
Updated: 2012-07-13
Packaged: 2017-11-09 21:22:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/458583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/echinoderms/pseuds/echinoderms
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>CGC: 1 H4V3 D3C1D3D TH4T TH3 ONLY TRULY L4WFUL PROC3DUR3 WOULD B3 FOR M3 TO T3LL YOU 4LL WH4T YOUR3 M1SS1NG<br/>CGC: BY H4V1NG N3V3R R34LLY M3T H1M<br/>CGC: THOUGH TO B3 P3RF3CTLY FR4NK YOU PROB4BLY WOULDNT H4V3 SM3LL3D MUCH OF H1M 4NYW4Y<br/>CGC: QU13T F3LLOW YOU KNOW, K3PT TO H1MS3LF MOST OF TH3 T1M3<br/>CGC: 3XC3PT WH3N 4NY ON3 OF US H4D 4 CR1S1S ON OUR H4NDS TH3N H3 WOULD SUDD3NLY SHOW UP 4LL<br/>CGC: YOU R4NG?</p>
            </blockquote>





	4LL MY FR13NDS 4R3 D34D!

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the first official bonus round of the Homestuck Shipping Olympics!
> 
> ADDITIONAL WARNINGS: blood, ableist language, emetophobia warning

**CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW opened memo on board 4LL MY FR13NDS 4R3 D34D >:[**

**CGC: TH1S 1S 4 H1GHLY PROF3SS1ON4L DOCUM3NT 4ND 4NYON3 WHO R3SPONDS TO 1T W1TH SOM3TH1NG NOT H1GHLY PROF3SS1ON4L 4ND/OR H1GHLY D3PR3SS1NG W1LL B3 H3LD 1N CONT3MPT UND3R JUDG3 T3R3Z1 PYROP3 OF TH3 B1G FLO4TY ROCK 1N SP4C3 JUR1SD1CT1ON  
CGC: YOU H4V3 4 R1GHT TO R3M41N S1LENT  
CGC: 1F YOU G1V3 UP TH3 R1GHT TO R3M41N S1L3NT TH3N 4NYTH1NG YOU S4Y C4N 4ND W1LL B3 H3LD 4G41NST YOU 1N TH3 LONG L1ST OF R34SONS WHY YOUR3 A D1SR3SP3CTFUL J3RK  
CGC: TH4T M34NS YOU, K4RK4T!!!  >:P  
CGC: BL4H BL4H T3CHN1C4L J4RGON TH4T 4NYBODY WHOS 3V3R S4T 1N FRONT OF 4 TV FOR TH1RTY M1NUT3S 1S 4LR34DY S1CK TO D34TH OF H34RING  
CGC: YOUR HONOR4BL3 TYR4NNY, W3 H3R3BY OFF3R YOU TH1S HUMBL3 S4CR1F1C3 BL1BB3TY BL4H TH3 T1M3 FOR US3L3SS MOOD S3TT1NG ST4T3M3NTS 1S OFF1C14LLY OV3R!!  
CGC: W1LL TH3 D3F3ND4NT PL34S3 R1S3?  
CGC: OH W41T H3 C4NT  
CGC: H3S D34D!!!! >:'[  
CGC: WH1CH, 4S 4NYON3 W1TH TWO BR41NC3LLS H4S 4LR34DY F1GUR3D OUT, 1S WHY W3V3 G4TH3R3D H3R3 TOD4Y!!  
CGC: 1N L13U OF OUR SOC1ETY'S TR4D1T1ON4L PROC3DUR3 OF L34V3 TH3 D3L1C1OUS ROTT1NG FL3SH OUTS1D3 TO B3 34T3N BY 4 HUNGRY HUNGRY LUSUS...  
CGC: 4ND OF TH3 CORPS3 P4RTY TH4TS SUPPOS3DLY TR4D1T1ON4L FOR HUM4NS  
CGC: (WH1CH, 1M TOLD BY ON3 OF MY TWO 4MB4SS4DORS TO 4N 3XPLOD3D PL4N3T 1N 4 DY1NG D1M3NS1ON THR33 F4NC1FUL Y3LLOW Y4RD Y34RS 4WAY, 1NVOLV3S STUFFY L1COR1C3 L4C3, L3NGTHY PS3UDO PO3T1C T4L3S OF TH3 D3C34S3DS H3RO1C 3XPLO1TS, 4ND 4N 4FT3R P4RTY CH4R4CT3R1ZED L4RG3LY BY 3MPTY KL33N3X BOX3S 4ND UNTOUCH3D HORS DO3UVR3S)  
CGC: 1 H4V3 D3C1D3D TH4T TH3 ONLY TRULY L4WFUL PROC3DUR3 WOULD B3 FOR M3, T3R3Z1 PYROP3, B3ST FR13ND OF THE D34RLY D3P4RT3D  
CGC: OF MY B3ST FR13ND SOLLUX C4PTOR  
CGC: >:'[  
CGC: TO T3LL YOU 4LL, 4ND MOST 3SP3C14LLY OUR 3XOT1C V1S1TORS, WH4T YOUR3 M1SS1NG  
CGC: BY H4V1NG N3V3R R34LLY M3T H1M  
CGC: THOUGH TO B3 P3RF3CTLY FR4NK YOU PROB4BLY WOULDNT H4V3 SM3LL3D MUCH OF H1M 4NYW4Y  
CGC: QU13T F3LLOW YOU KNOW, K3PT TO H1MS3LF MOST OF TH3 T1M3  
CGC: 3XC3PT WH3N 4NY ON3 OF US H4D 4 CR1S1S ON OUR H4NDS TH3N H3 WOULD SUDD3NLY SHOW UP 4LL  
CGC: YOU R4NG? >8]  
CGC (TH3 31GHT 1S FOR H1S DW33BY JOLLY R4NCH3R SH4D3S BY TH3 W4Y)  
CGC: BUT TH3 PO1NT 1S 1 GU3SS M3 4ND K4RK4T 4ND 4R4D14 4ND F3F3R1 4ND K4N4Y4 W3R3 4LL R34LLY LUCKY TO H4V3 KNOWN H1M!!  
CGC: H3 W4S 4 R4R3 TR34T  
CGC: TH3 K1ND OF GUY YOU S4V3 FOR SP3C14L OCC4S1ONS  
CGC: 4LTHOUGH TRUTH B3 TOLD 1 WOULD 34T FROST3D B3H3MOTH L34V1NG 3V3RYD4Y 1F 1 COULD 4ND 1F 1D H4D MOR3 OPPORTUN1T13S TO H4NG OUT W1TH M1ST3R POPS1CL3 P13 1 WOULD H4V3 T4K3N THOS3 TOO!  
CGC: 1 D1DNT M33T H1M UNT1L W4Y TOO L4T3 1F YOU 4SK M3 BUT H3 D1D H4V3 4 LOT OF L4RG3LY M1SL34D1NG 4ND S3LFD3PR3C4T1NG STOR13S SO 1 GU3SS 1LL US3 THOS3 FOR R3F3R3NC3  
CGC: 4POLOG13S YOUR HONOR FOR THE 1NFORM4L1TY OF TH3S3 PROC33D1NGS OH H3LL W1TH 1T  
CGC: 1 DONT R3M3MB3R SOLLUXS WR1GGL1NG D4Y  
CGC: H3 S41D 4 LOT OF RUD3 STUFF 4LL TH3 T1M3 4T TH3 3XP3NS3 OF BOTH H1MS3LF 4ND TH3 SOC4LL3D 1D1OTS WHO L3T H1M THROUGH TH3 TR14LS  
CGC: H3D K1ND OF CONV1NC3D H1MS3LF H3 W4S DOOM3D FROM TH3 ST4RT  
CGC: WH1CH 1 GU3SS W4S TRU3 BUT H3 W4S WRONG 4BOUT SOM3 OF 1T  
CGC: SOLLUX PR3D1CT3D TH4T H3D B3 T4K3N FROM US TOO YOUNG BUT H3 N3V3R S41D MUCH 4BOUT WH4T H3D DO TO D3S3RV3 1T  
CGC: M4YB3 H3 KN3W 4LL 4LONG TH4T H3D GO OUT S4V1NG H1S FR13NDS 4ND W4S JUST TRY1NG TO B3 HUMBL3 4BOUT 1T!  
CGC: C4US3 1 M34N H3LL 4S MUCH 4S TH3 L1TTL3 DORK B34TS  
CGC: US3D TO B34T UP ON H1MS3LF I KNOW FOR A F4CT!!  
CGC: TH4T H3 KN3W H3 W4S C4P4BL3 OF 4 WHOL3 LOT  
CGC: 3V3N 4T TRULY R1D1CULOUS ODDS H3 W4S S3R1OUSLY SOM3 K1ND OF M4ST3RM1ND  
CGC: H3 W4S TH3 ON3 WHO COD3D TH3 G4M3 D1D YOU GUYS KNOW TH4T??  
CGC: NOT B3C4US3 H3 THOUGHT 1T WOULD B3 FUN FOR TH3 WHOL3 F4M1LY OR SOM3 SH1T  
CGC: H3 D1D 1T B3C4US3 H3 THOUGHT 1T WOULD S4V3 US  
CGC: S4V3 TH3 WHOL3 WORLD, 4ND K1LL H1M 1N R3TURN  
CGC: 1T W4S 4 PR3D1CT1ON H3 M4D3 ON TH3 4UTHOR1TY OF TH3 VO1C3S 1N H1S H34D BUT 1 GU3SS H3 GOT CONFUS3D B3C4US3 R34LLY THE G4M3 D1D JUST TH3 OPPOS1T3  
CGC: BUT TH3 F1RST TH1NG H3 D1D ONC3 H3 GOT 1N TH3 G4M3 W4S S4CR1F1C3 H1MS3LF TO S4V3 4LL OF US SO C4N YOU R34LLY BL4M3 H1M FOR B31NG 4 L1TTL3 FUZZY ON TH3 D3T41LS?  
CGC: W3LL H3R3S 4 H1NT  
CGC: 1F YOU DO TH3N YOULL B3 H3LD 1N CONT3MPT BY WH1CH 1 M34N YOULL H4V3 TO WR1GGL3RS1T M3 FOR 4BOUT 4N HOUR WH1L3 1 S1T ON YOUR KN33S 4ND W41L >:[  
CGC: BUT 4S YOUR M4GN4N1MOUS 4ND CH4R1T4BL3 BO4RD L34D3R 1 D3CL4R3 1T MY DUTY TO SP4R3 US BOTH FROM TH4T F4T3!  
CGC: SO 1NST34D 1M GO1NG TO T3LL YOU 4BOUT TH3 F1RST T1M3 W3 M3T  
CGC: H3 S41D 1 H4D TH3 MOST 4NNOY1NG TYP1NG QU1RK OF 4NYON3 H3D Y3T H4D TH3 D1SPL34SUR3 OF SP34K1NG TO 4ND 1 S41D W3LL R1GHT B4CK 4T Y4 BUST3R! >:P  
CGC: H3 S4YS TH4T TO 3V3RYON3 THOUGH, 4ND 1 COULD T3LL H3 W4S JOK1NG B3C4US3 H3 K3PT T4LK1NG TO M3 FOR L1K3 THR33 MOR3 HOURS 4FT3R TH4T  
CGC: MOSTLY H3 COMPL41N3D 4BOUT H1S L1F3 BUT YOU KNOW TH3 FUNNY TH1NG 4BOUT SOLLUX C4PTOR 1S TH4T H3 H4S SO MUCH PR4CT1C3 COMPL41N1NG TH4T H3 KNOWS HOW TO M4K3 1T PR3TTY FR1GG1N H1L4R1OUS TO L1ST3N TO  
CGC: H3 H34RD VO1C3S, H3 TOLD M3! TORTUR3D VO1C3S OF TH3 SOON TO B3 D3C34S3D 4LL WH1N1NG 1N UN1SON 4BOUT TH3 SH1T TH3Y W1SH3D TH3Y COULD H4V3 DON3 WH1L3 TH3Y W3R3 4L1V3  
CGC: WH1CH H3 TOLD M3 T3ND3D TO B3 SURPR1S1NGLY MUND4N3  
CGC: 4 L1M3BLOOD FROM 4L13NT1C4 W1SH3D SH3D F3D H3R LUSUS TH4T MORN1NG  
CGC: F4LK3N R1T3RD, 4 BLU3BLOOD ST4T1ON3D ON OTH3R14, W4NT3D TO S33 H1S M4T3SPR1T ON3 L4ST T1M3  
CGC: SO H3 COULD T3LL H3R TO TURN OFF H1S OV3N  
CGC: 1TS FUN TO H34R 4BOUT BUT H3 THOUGHT 1T W4S 4 R34L DR4G  
CGC: SOLLUX C4PTOR W4S 4LR34DY THOROUGHLY D1S1LLUS1ON3D W1TH TH3 WOND3RS OF OUR SOC13TY 4ND 1TS M4NY H3RO1C C1T1Z3NS BY TH3 T1M3 H3 R34CH3D TWO SW33PS  
CGC: 1TS NOT H3RO1C OR 4NYTH1NG 1T W4S JUST  
CGC: H3 M4D3 OUT L1K3 1T W4S 4 M41N TH1NG 4BOUT H1S L1F3 4ND 1T W4S R34LLY 4NNOY1NG TO L1ST3N TO H1M WH1N1NG 4BOUT 1T!!!  
CGC: BUT NOW TH4T H3S NOT H3R3 TO G3T 4 B1G H34D 4BOUT M3 S4Y1NG TH1S 1M GONN4 4DM1T TH4T  
CGC: 1T S33MS TO M3 YOU C4N WH1N3 4BOUT YOUR B4D LUCK 4LL YOU W4NT 4ND 1TLL ST1LL F4LL ON D34F 34RS 1F YOU THROW SOM3 H3RO1CS 1NTO TH3 FR33 P4RK1NG SP4C3 3V3RY ONC3 1N 4 WH1L3  
CGC: 4LTHOUGH H3 TOT4LLY SUCK3D 4T MONOPOLY SO H3D R3S3NT M3 S4Y1NG TH4T  
CGC: OK4Y 1M G3TT1NG SO OFF TOP1C H3R3 1T SHOULDNT B3 L3G4L  
CGC: CHRONOLOG1C4LLY WH4T YOUV3 GOTT4 KNOW N3XT 1S TH4T WH3N M1ST3R 4PPL3B3RRY BL4ST FOUND OUT TH3 G4M3 WOULD SP4R3 US BUT D3STROY TH3 WHOL3 WORLD H3 D1DNT 3V3N W4NT TO PL4Y 4NYMOR3  
CGC: H3 TR13D TO G3T US 4LL TO STOP BUT NOBODY L1ST3N3D  
CGC: NOBODY 3LS3 G4V3 4 SH1T >:[  
CGC: SO H3 JO1N3D UP 4NYW4Y 4ND B4M F1RST TH1NG TH4T H4PP3NS 1S H3 G3TS GLUBB3D TO D34TH BY 4 HUG3 SH1TTY MONST3R T3NT4CL3 F1SH LUSUS  
CGC: NO OFF3NS3 TO MS P31X3S, M4Y SH3 R3ST GL33FULLY 1N TH3 DR34MBUBBL3S SH3 H3LP3D M4K3 FOR US  
CGC: BUT 4NYW4Y H3 COM3S B4CK TO L1F3 W1TH TH3 H3LP OF H1S D3RS3 BODY WH1CH 1NC1D3NT4LLY W4S ONLY ON3 OF TWO DR34M S3LV3S 4LOTT3D TO MR C4PTOR 4S P4RT OF TH3 D3LUX3 P4CK4G3 TH4T COM3S W1TH H4V1NG 4 BR41N STR41GHT OUT OF SC13NC3 F1CT1ON  
CGC: TH1S 1S ON3 OF MY STRONG3ST P13C3S OF 3V1D3NC3 FOR TH3 TH3ORY TH4T SGRUBS M41N OBJ3CT1V3 1S TO FUCK YOUR SH1T UP ON 4 D33PLY P3RSON4L 4ND PR3F3R4BLY OFF3NS1V3 L3V3L  
CGC: UNL3SS YOURE GOOD 4T TH1NGS TH3N 1T JUST P4TS YOU ON TH3 B4CK 4ND S4YS GOOD JOB H3R3S 4 PL4N3T FULL OF 4LL TH3 TH1NGS YOU L1K3 NOW GO SOLV3 SOM3 LOG1C PUZZL3S 4ND F1GHT CR1M3  
CGC: NOT TH4T 1M COMPL41N1NG BUT J3SUS  
CGC: SOLLUX W4S ON3 OF TH3 B1GG3ST H3RO3S 1N OUR 3NT1R3 S3SS1ON 4ND WH4T D1D SGRUB H4V3 TO S4Y 4BOUT 1T?  
CGC: DURR DUR DURRRRR DORKY K1D W1TH 4 MUT4NT BR41N L3TS JUST M4K3 FUN OF H1M FOR 1T SOM3 MOR3!!  
CGC: BR41NS 4ND F1R3! US3L3SS SH1TS4CK OF 4 PL4N3T 4ND P3RSON4LLY 1NSULT1NG TO BOOT  
CGC: H3H3H3 G3T 1T SOLLUX? C4US3 YOUR BR41NS B4S1C4LLY 4LW4YS ON F1R3 R1GHT DUR HUR 4R3NT 1 CL3V3R, S4YS SGRUB  
CGC: BUT SOLLUX JUST S4YS  
CGC: YOU M1GHT TH1NK 1TS FUNNY BUT 1V3 H34RD 1T 4 M1LL1ON T1M3S >8[ >8[  
CGC: SO 4NYW4Y ONC3 H3 G3TS R3V1V3D 4ND SP33DS OFF TO TH3 L4ND OF H34D4CH3S 4ND BURNT H41R SM3LL  
CGC: (4ND G1V3S US 4LL 4 F3W MOM3NTS TO PLUG UP OUR NOS3S 1N R3VULS1ON, JUST 4S 4NOTH3R SHOW OF 4LL TH3 K1NDN3SS 1N H1S 3XP4ND1NG 4ND COLL4PS1NG OK4Y SHUT UP)  
CGC: TH3 F1SH PR1NC3SS 4ND TH3 V3RY S4M3 B1G RUBB3RY L1PS SH3 US3D TO K1SS H1M B4CK TO L1F3 D3C1D3D TH4T M4YB3 TH3Y L1K3D K1SS1NG SOLLUX, M4YB3 TH3YD L1K3 TO G3T TO KNOW H1M 4 L1TTL3 B3TT3R 1N ORD3R TO F4C1L1T4T3 MOR3 FUTUR3 K1SS3S!  
CGC: SH3 D1DNT G3T OUT MUCH 4LR1GHT, H31R3SS3S 4PP4R3NTS3S G3N3R4LLY DONT  
CGC: SO TH3 G4M3 CONT1NU3S ON W1TH H1M S3RV1NG H3R 3TC 3TC  
CGC: WH1CH 1S PR3TTY GRODY CONS1D3R1NG TH31R R3SP3CT1V3 BLOOD C4ST3S BUT FOR TH3 S4K3 OF NOT M4K1NG 4LL F1V3 R3M41N1NG 4LT3RN14N C1T1Z3NS 1N TH3 UN1V3RS3 UNCOMFORT4BL3 1 W1LL TRY TO L34V3 R4C3 OUT OF TH1S STORY  
CGC: 4ND TH3 OTH3R F1SH, WHO, 4S LONG 4S W3R3 SP34K1NG 1N CONF1D3NC3, 1 MUST 4DM1T 1 F1ND MUCH L3SS P4L4T4BL3  
CGC: D3C1D3S TH3 T1M3 1S R1P3 FOR 4 BL4CKROM! BUT N33D 1 R3M1ND YOU 3R1D4N 1S 4 D1SGUST1NG SH1TTY L1TTL3 SH1T 4ND aww sh1t sol you took my g1rl 1S 4 SH1TTY L1TTL3 SH1T MOT1V4TOR FOR 4 R1V4LRY 4NYW4Y SO 4PPL3B3RRY D1D H1S B3ST TO ST4Y OUT OF 1T  
CGC: BUT TH3N!!  
CGC: SUDD3NLY OUT OF NOWH3R3!  
CGC: 3R1D4N SCOOP3D OUT SOLLUXS D3L3CT4BL3 JOLLY R4NCH3RS 4ND K1LL3D TH3 F1SH PR1NC3SS 4ND K1LL3D K4N4Y4 4ND PUNCH3D TH3 M4TR1ORB 1N TH3 TH1NG TH4T M4K3S 1T WORK 4LL 1N ON3 F3LL SWOOP Y44444Y SOD4S 4ND C4NDY FOR 4LL!!!  
CGC: H3S D34D NOW DONT WORRY K1DS  
CGC: NO F1SHY H1PST3R DORKS W1LL B3 H3R3 TO GO BUMP 1N TH3 N1GHT TH4NKS TO D34R OLD MS CHLOROPHYLL  
CGC: 4NYW4Y 4FT3R SOLLUX W3NT BL1ND WH1CH BY TH3 W4Y FOR 4LL YOU DUND3RH34DS 1N TH3 4UD13NC3 WHO M1SS3D 1T COUGH COUGH G4MZ33 COUGH 1S WH4T 3R1D4N D1D TO H1M H3 4CTU4LLY S33M3D 4 L1TTL3 SUNN13R!!  
CGC: 4ND NOT JUST B3C4US3 TH3R3 W4SNT 4NY MOR3 R3D 4ND BLU3 TO COV3R UP TH3 ST1NK OF H1S BLOOD 31TH3R  
CGC: TH3R3 W3R3 4N 3NT1R3 F3W HOURS TH3R3 DUR1NG WH1CH SOLLUX W4S JUST 4 DORKY L1TTL3 K1D W1TH 4 V4C4NT SM1L3 WHO WOULDNT STOP M4RV3L1NG 4BOUT TH3 QU13T 1NS1D3 H1S H34D NO M4TT3R HOW M4NY T1M3S W3 4LL 3XPL41N3D W3 COULDNT H34R 1T!  
CGC: NOT TH4T H3 H4D MUCH 3LS3 TO 4PPR3C14T3 1N TH3 W4K3 OF H1S L1TTL3 B4BY M4T3SPR1T F4LL1NG D34D ON TH3 FLOOR, 4 C3RT41N DOOFUS CLOWN POPP1NG OP3N 4 C4N OF FUCK1NG CR4ZY 4ND H1S TWO B3ST FR13NDS GO1NG 4WOL 4T TH3 WORST POSS1BL3 T1M3  
CGC: SORRY 4G41N FOR MY CONTR1BUT1ON TH3R3 BUDDY >:[  
CGC: BUT 3V3N THOUGH TH1S W4S M4YB3 TH3 F1RST T1M3 4NYTH1NG H4D 3V3R H4PP3N3D TO H1M TH4T CH4NG3D H1S L1F3 FOR TH3 B3TT3R  
CGC: TH3 BL1ND1NG 1 M34N S1NC3 1T S1L3NC3D H1S DOOMS4Y3RS 4ND 4PP4R3NTLY D1DNT 3V3N HURT TH4T B4D??  
CGC: WH3N C3RT41N D34TH C4M3 KNOCK1NG FOR TH3 B1LL1ONTH T1M3 1N TH3 FORM OF 4 G1G4NT1C SW1RL1NG GR33N B4LL TH4T W3 H4D B33N 1NFORM3D WOULD BE D1S4PP34R1NG R4TH3R TH4N CLOGG1NG UP OUR NOS3S W1TH 3NOUGH SOUR GR33N 4PPL3 TO M4K3 YOU W4NT TO PUK3!!  
CGC: H3 W4S ST1LL R34DY FOR T4K3OFF WH1CH 1 4CTU4LLY M34N F41RLY L1T3R4LLY  
CGC: SUPPOS3DLY TH4TS TH3 WHOL3 PO1NT OF P3OPL3 L1K3 H1M 1S TO P1LOT STUFF TH4T FLO4TS 4ROUND 1N SP4C3 4ND NON3 OF US L1K3 TO TH1NK MUCH 4BOUT TH3 GL4NC3S W3 3XCH4NG3D 4T TH3 MOM3NT W3 4LL R3M3MB3R3D TH4T  
CGC: 1 4LMOST W1SH H3D H4D TH3 T1M3 TO COM3 OV3R 4LL SMUG 4BOUT 1T  
CGC: H4H4H4H4 GOD C4NT YOU JUST H34R TH3 SMUG L1TTL3 B4ST4RD!  
CGC: "W3LL T4K3 4 SN1FF 4T TH4T, TZ, GU3SS WHO G3TS TO D13 TW1C3 4FT3R 4LL  
CGC: "TH3 STUP1D MUT4NT Y3LLOWBLOODS 4 G3N1US BUT TH4T DO3SNT M34N H3 3V3R G3TS TO H4V3 4NY FUN  
CGC: "TH3Y SHOULD M4K3 4 C4UT1ON4RY T4L3 4BOUT WH4T H4PP3NS TO GUYS L1K3 M3"  
CGC: H3 D1DNT G1V3 4 SH1T THOUGH NO SN1D3 COMM3NTS OR 4NYTH1NG H3 JUST ST3PS OUT R1GHT 1N FRONT OF US 4ND SORT OF  
CGC: W3LL 1T W4SNT TH4T PROFOUND OR PO3T1C TO W1TN3SS  
CGC: T1NY L1TTL3 S1X SW33P OLD BOY GR1TT1NG H1S P34RLY WH1T3S 4ND CL3NCH1NG H1S H4NDS T1L TH3Y DR4W BLOOD  
CGC: BL4CK L1COR1C3 P1TS WH3R3 3Y3S SHOULD BE F1LL1NG UP W1TH L3MON CUST4RD  
CGC: TH3 K1ND YOU DONT L3T YOURS3LF 34T  
CGC: L1K3 F1ND1NG 4 BOTTL3 OF M1LK W1TH SOM3BODY 3LS3S N4M3 ON 1T UPTURN3D 4ND SP1LL3D ON TH3 GROUND  
CGC: WH1CH 1S WH4T H3 3V3NTU4LLY D1D TOO  
CGC: BY TH3 T1M3 YOU GUYS 4RR1V3D THE SM3LL OF GR33N 4PPL3 W4S 4LL BUT DROWN3D OUT BY 1RON 4ND L3MON 4ND K4RK4TS B1L3 SO UH SORRY 4BOUT TH4T  
CGC: W3 W3R3 4LL TOO BUSY TO S4Y MUCH 4BOUT 1T 4T TH3 T1M3 SO TH4TS WHY 1M T3LL1NG YOU NOW  
CGC: 1 W4NT H1S STORY TO GO DOWN 1N SOM3 K1ND OF H1STORY 3V3N 1F 1TS JUST TH3 H1STORY OF B31NG TYP3D PO1NTL3SSLY 1NTO 4 VO1D  
CGC: B3C4US3 H3 W4S MY B3ST FR13ND 4ND W3 WOULDNT B3 H3R3 1F 1T W4SNT FOR H1M 4ND HOW M4NY OF YOU OTHER CHUMPS C4N S4Y TH4T?? >:P  
CGC: >:'[**

CGC closed memo.


End file.
